So whatever happens, just take a moment to think about it before you response, no matter how strongly you feel the need to leap into action.
You need to develop an attitude of detachment from whatever happens and a willingness to think about whether your immediate knee-jerk reaction is actually the best one. You do this by allowing the “quiet observer” to take control and look at the situation without interfering emotion. This takes a few moments more than an automatic unthinking life-script response, but it can make a huge difference.
It may seem a difficult thing to do, but your attitude to anything is a choice you make. If you struggle with it in the beginning, try asking yourself what the facts of the case are and on that basis what should be done. Remember you can also see the incident as the funniest thing that ever happened to you, the worst thing that ever happened and the biggest challenge you’ve ever faced. This helps to defuse the emotion. Then just look at the facts.
In the beginning this may be quite hard to implement because we are so used to responding automatically – a slave to generations of life scripts, probably going right back to the cave. But once you’ve done it a few times, it gets easier and easier. Just a moment’s pause to think about your response. And you may respond completely differently.
Don’t try this if you’re faced with a genuine life-threatening imminent danger. Then you need to act fast.
(continued from part II)
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