Self-Coaching, Transaction Analysis
In the Psychological Mind-Game, both parties begin the communication in the Adult Role, or at least from the same Ego State. In the immediate conversation cited above, the opening exchange was probably fairly superficial, most likely characterized as a Reciprocal Transaction in which both parties communicate at a superficial level from the same ego state.
The natural child-ego is the essence of a child. It is a raw, wild and uninhibited bundle of emotion. The emotions range from curiosity to anger to joy. Interests are fleeting but can be deep when held. However, children are a stream of ideas and entities with a short attention span. Thus the child-ego and children in general naturally bounce from plaything to activity to novelty.
Time is very important to human beings. We have need to structure time: to fill our time in different ways. One of the worst ways to treat anybody is to deprive them of all sensory input and to leave them with no way of filling the time available to them. Even withdrawal which might seem to be a period where we do nothing is deceptive in this regard, Rather than doing nothing we are actually engaged in a process of introspection.
Influence of upbringing/education when tolerating the rules
Rules can be accepted as necessary for someone’s safety. Boundaries can even be a sign of love and concern, such as parents strictly enforcing a “don’t touch the stove” rule. The parents care enough to create rules for the child’s safety and then enforce it, allowing children to know that everything that is permitted is safe.
Activation of the (seemingly) present-day child-ego occurs when we revert to a childlike state. This does not mean that adults abandon all logic or hide in a corner, sucking their thumb. Activation of the (seemingly) present-day child-ego results in adults making decisions based on emotions, whims, primitive fears, deference to parental figures despite their own opinions or a refusal to think about the consequences.